The Strong-willed Child

This is my Jordan. Age 3.5 years. Otherwise known as The Strong-willed Child. He is younger brother to Shaun, who, until recently, held the title of Most Strong-willed Child in North Georgia. I have now passed this title on to Jordan. Don't let the meek, innocent look fool you. Although the J-Man is sweet, loving, and precious, he is also the PICTURE of a Strong-willed Child.

This hasn't all come about overnight. No, we've always known Jordan has a strong will. It just seems that the older he gets, the stronger his will becomes. I know a lot of this is related to the fact that he's a boy. And, in a way, I'm GLAD he's hyper-active and action packed. What mom wants a sissy-fied boy? Not me. But I also know that Jordan needs boundaries. Discipline. Extra attention. He needs to know who's boss and he needs to follow the rules. This is where we're having problems. Not the rules part- he knows the rules. He knows right from wrong. He just doesn't seem to care if he follows the rules or not- even though he gets punished for breaking them.

For example:

Wearing clothes. Jordan hates to wear clothes. Because he's a boy, and because he doesn't sweat, I do not insist that he wear a shirt when we're around the house. Underwear and shorts is fine with me. I lost count of the times today that I made him put his shorts and undies back on. I also lost count of the number of times I saw his naked bottom streaking though our house. We've spanked (using hands, belts, and hickories). We've used time-outs. We've taken toys away. And he STILL tries to get away with not wearing clothes.

Urinating in the floor. Yes, I actually said that. My potty-trained 3 year old pees in the floor. He's done it twice today. He knows that pee and poo go in the potty. He knows not to pee in the floor. After he did this today, I took him to his room, spanked him, and gave him a time-out. Then I asked him if he knew why he was being punished. He looked at me and said "Because I pee pee'd on the floor". I asked him if he knew where pee was supossed to go. His reply was "In the potty". What do I do? As I said before, he DOES get punished for doing this. He has received 2 HARD spankings today for this. He understands that its wrong, and if he does it he'll get punished. And he chooses to do it anyway.

These are just a few of the struggles we're dealing with. Now, what do I do about it? For sure, I'm praying. For Jordan and for myself. As I said earlier, a part of me is glad Jordan has a strong will. He'll need it as he grows older, to survive. Especially once he becomes a Christian. But he also must learn to respect authority and to follow rules. I know God has given me strong-willed children for a reason. Its my job to train them up. Its so scary to think about how the parenting choices I make will effect what kinds people my boys grow up to be.

I need to find the balance between breaking Jordan's will and disciplining him. I'm praying for answers that I know will come. In the meantime, I'm keeping on keeping on. And thanking God for blessing me with a wonderful, loving, hyper, mischievious, action-filled little boy. Times two!