"Many plans are in a man's mind, but it is the Lord's purpose for him that will stand."

Proverbs 19:21

Monday, February 3, 2014

The Strong-willed Child? Or The Steroid?

I think we've hit the terrible two's early.  As it turns out, Violet's not so different from her brothers in this way.  Her little "personality" has been making appearances here and there for the past month or so, but now it's shown itself in full force.  

Okay, well.  In fairness, some of it could be the fact that she was on a steroid for her cough for a few days.  Let's just go with that, shall we?  Even though she's been off The Steroid for a few days because her mood swings were so bad that I didn't really see the point in them.  

Last week, on day 2 of The Steroid, I took all three kids grocery shopping.  I didn't have a choice because I had put it off so long that we were literally out of food.  The kids started to complain, so I gave in and went food shopping. Ha!

We went to Aldi first.  I love Aldi.  I love it even more when Shaun is with me because he really is a big help with his sister.  And he's old enough to push the cart back to the corral all by himself.  I really was just going to get the bare basics and get back home.  Enough to last through the weekend.  I thought the trip would be easy enough.  Oh, how wrong I was!

Violet was just...terrible.  She was terrible!  I've never seen her act so badly in her whole life.  Usually, when we're out at any store, she's a social butterfly.  She waves and says "Hey" to every person we pass.  Seriously.  Every.  Single.  Person.  Most people ooh and aahh over her when she talks to them, which is probably why she does it.  It really is adorable.

Not this day.  

First off, she wouldn't sit inside the cart. I mean, she just wouldn't.  I know all the people who haven't had any babies are laughing and shaking their heads and wondering what's so hard about making a one year old sit in a cart.  After all, I'm so much bigger and stronger than her.  Or so I thought.  She  really proved me wrong.  I finally bribed her with a sucker from the bank.  All of that green food dye worked it's magic and she finally settled down and we were able to start shopping.  

I muttered under my breath to the boys that we needed to hurry up and get out of there.  They agreed.  I started barking out orders for things for them to grab.  Aldi was really crowded that day, especially for 2:00 in the afternoon.  Everyone was in everyone's way.  I knew we were finished as soon as that sucker melted away, so I was in a panic.  And then, only halfway through the store, the sucker disappeared.  

And my sweet little baby girl started screaming.  And climbing out of her seat.  Strangers passing by tried to talk to her and she just sulked and snarled her nose up at them.  I somehow managed to keep her inside the little seat on the cart with one hand and pushed the cart with my other.  I know it would have been easier to just hold her, but something told me that if I lost this battle, I'd lose every other future grocery store battle and I'd never be able to shop with her until she turned six years old.  So I bit my lip and we forged through.  I was embarrassed.  And sweaty and flustered.  The boys were embarrassed.  We finally (praise the Lord!) made it to the checkout line and then I swear my older kids just spaced out on me!  I couldn't unload because I had to hold Violet in the seat.  The boys started unloading the way they usually do.  We needed to be quick so I could let the cashier know that I needed to keep our current buggy before she started putting our groceries in another one.  Violet started grabbing random things off the shelves (including a big stuffed Valentines bear) so I dealt with her and when I looked up again both boys were looking at candy or staring off into space. Meanwhile, the cashier started putting the groceries that were already on the belt into another buggy up at the front of the line. 

 "Jordan!  Ask her if we can use this cart!  Hurry!"  

"Um....what?" said my eight year old, his eyes still on a Snickers bar.  "Mom, I have enough money for this candy bar.  Can I buy it?"

"What??  Forget the candy.  Please just let her know that we need to keep this buggy!"  Because can you imagine trying to bag our groceries up while wrestling with Crazy Baby?

Then Shaun yelled at the cashier  and asked if we could keep our cart. Oh my.  I know she thought we were the rudest people ever.  She told us that of course we could keep our cart but then she had to wait for me to get to the front of the line.  And my boys just stood there..."Boys!  I need to get by you.  Everybody's waiting!"

"Mom, can I please have this candy bar?  I have my own money!"

"Yes!  Get the candy.  Please move!"  Please remember that all of this time Violet had not stopped screaming once.  Jordan moved out of the way, but Shaun tried to shrink himself up against the wall so that I could get by.  Not sure what he was thinking, and I ran over his toe with the buggy.  That's when I heard snickering behind me.  Apparently the man behind us in line found us extremely amusing.  

I finally managed to pay and told the boys to forget trying to bag everything up at the counter.  We'd just do it at the car.  When we got to the car the boys started bagging everything all on their own.  Bless them!  I was so proud of them.  In the meantime, Violet was arching her back in a desperate (and unsuccessful)attempt to stay out of her car seat.  It took a good five minutes, but I got her in there.  

We finally left.  But we still had one more stop to make.  Kroger.  I was tempted to just forget it, but I only needed 5 things and Vi had calmed down.  She was covered in green sucker, but she was calm.  So I just went for it.  Into Kroger.  And Violet sat in the cart like she usually does.  For about five minutes.  Then she lost it.  I grabbed the first thing I saw on the closest shelf, a bag of yogurt covered pretzels.  That quieted her down.  Of course she still tried to snake herself out of the straps and escape when she thought I wasn't looking.  And of course we ran into some people we used to go to church with who had never seen her before.  They commented on how cute Vi is and I just had to say, "Well she's usually cuter.  When she's smiling and not green."    And of course there was a lady handing out samples of sausages that gave us a ten minute speech about her product with me smiling and inching away as I tried to keep my baby from climbing out of the seat and getting a concussion from falling and hitting her head on the floor.   

I was ready to collapse when we got home.  

That was the day that I used my Mom Card and ended The Steroid.  Her cough was better, anyway.  

Then today, it happened again.  This time at the library.  We had to get books for Shaun's science project.  I had written down what we needed and then left the list at home.  Again, all three kids were with me.  And again, Violet showed out.  She loves books.  A lot. And she wanted her hands on every single one she saw today.  Usually, she'll sit at a table or on the little couch and look at her books while I help the boys if they need it. Not today.  Every time any of us tried to do anything with her she just melted down.  Cried.  Screamed.  In the library!  Shaun found what he needed.  We just got all the books on the subject of his project, since we couldn't exactly browse through them with Violet acting the way she was.  

There was a long line at the desk so we used the self check out.  Jordan loves to do this, but he's not patient enough.  He moves the books before they're scanned and then has to put them back and then the same thing happens with the next book.  I tried to do it myself but just couldn't manage.  And Violet was still screaming and yes, we were getting all of the stares from every one of the library patrons.  

So, I got her out of there!  I took her outside and hissed at the boys to finish checking out the books and just hoped for the best. 

I went outside so that I could watch through the window.  Jordan tried to do it, and he didn't do it right, and Shaun was getting frustrated and giving me "I can't believe he's doing this" looks through the window.  It took forever!  When I would put Vi down she'd try to run off, so I had to hold her.  She struggled and cried and I'm surprised that no one called the cops on me for kidnapping.  

Well, the boys finally finished and made it outside without setting off the alarm.  Then we walked to the car and Violet pulled her old "arch the back" routine.  Aaauughgh!

What a trip.  

Today's Monday and her last dose of The Steroid was on Friday.  So I'm not sure what I'm dealing with... yet another strong-willed child or just The Steroid.  I guess time will tell. 

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