"Do you need to use the restroom? Are you sure? Well, you need to stop touching your private parts. If you feel like you must touch it, please go to your room and close the door."
"Yes, you must wash your hands. Because you just used the toilet. If you want to go back to our table and eat, you must wash your hands. Because your hands are dirty. Because you put them on the toilet, and toilets are dirty. Because other people have had their bottoms on it. Just wash your hands!"
"Please don't hold the puppy by her neck. Because you could hurt her. I know she won't stay in your lap. Probably because you've squeezed her too hard and she's afraid of you. "
"Okay, that is SO inappropriate. We do NOT fart that way in public. And if you do, you certainly don't need to announce it to everyone. I don't care if Dad thinks its funny- its rude!"
"Jordan...give me the knife. Bring it back to me right now. Right this minute! I know Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fight with knives, but you're not a turtle. Where did you find that, anyway. I said bring it to me right now! "
"Please do not use my cellphone to take pictures of your brother's bottom. That's not what cell phones are for. If you do that again, I won't let you play games on my phone anymore."
1 comment:
Oh my goodness, too funny! That sounds like a lot of what is said in our house!!
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